Thursday, May 28, 2009

Who Would've Thought?

For the first time in my life I really do not aspire to be more in my career. In some ways this is a little ego bruising, but in a lot of other ways it is a relief. Now, this doesn't mean that I'm one of those people who do "just enough" to stay below the radar. I take a great deal of pride in a job well done and nothing irritates me more than laziness. But, the alleviation of pressure to do more, faster and better than everyone else has been nice.

If you would have told me 10 years ago that all I wanted to do was be a mom and wife, I would've bet my life on it that you were crazy. I spent most of my twenties working at an insane pace to pillage and plunder the career world. Work was everything - and as crazy as it sounds, the industry I'm in wasn't one I had even wanted to be in. I was so wrapped up in the climbing of the corporate power (money) ladder, that all I focused on was the prize and lost sight of what makes me happy.

Being a SAHM for two years has really helped me see life on both sides of the fence. I made the huge mistake of allowing my job to define who I am and on occasion still allow my job to validate my worth. I also assumed staying home was easier-uh, WRONG. Maybe the prize at the end of all this is just plain knowledge. There is something to be said about just knowing yourself. I used to be that lady who thought kids were an inconvenient side-note to life's expectations (a sign of my naivete). Now I'm the lady who is empathizing with, not cursing at, the mom with the screaming kids on a plane. Who would've thought...

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