Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Mother Knows Best...

Well, my mother has apparently taken to reading my blog and sent me a supportive (smack upside the head) message in the form of a "talking gnome card" from the e-card service she subscribes to. I have to admit that the delivery was genius and the message was right on. In a nutshell she basically told me to suck it up and quit whining because I'm luckier than I'll ever know - specifically because I have "...3 healthy kids, a husband who doesn't hang out with hookers, and no one has cancer (in our family)." Since my own mom survived 5 less than perfect children (of which I'm the oldest), I guess she's earned her street cred. I love the "husband who doesn't hang out with hookers" part--seriously, Mom?

But, she's 100% right. I think I get caught up in my pity party sometimes and I don't acknowledge how lucky I really am. The work thing is a double edged sword. I am SO incredibly thankful to have a good paying job in these tough times. We definitely pay for where we have chosen to live and it must have been worth it if I'm still doing it (that and my house didn't sell when we put it on the market a year ago). I definitely know moms who feel that they are better moms for working and having something that is just theirs. I'm envious that I don't feel that way; I wish I did. Once I had my kids, all I wanted to be was their mommy. It is how I define myself and my purpose.

For me, a good mother puts what she wants aside for the welfare of her family. At the very top of the list, my family needed me to step up and find a way to provide for them so we could keep a roof over our head and food on the table. I've done that and will keep doing that as long as I need to. If I passed on the opportunity to take care of them and provide a happy and safe life, how could I say that I loved them with all that I am? I think that you love your family the most when you have to make tough decisions you don't want to, but that are ultimately best for them. Maybe somebody else could turn a cheek, but I know I couldn't.

Being a mother is a tough job. It's the greatest leap of faith most of us will ever take. It is also the greatest reward we will ever receive IF we give it all we got. I like to think of motherhood as a bank in which you keep making deposits. Someday, if you deposit enough, invest enough, you'll have a life and a family to be proud of.

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