Monday, April 4, 2011

Jack of All Trades, Master of None

Our Softball/Baseball season is in full swing.  A round of bad weather actually pushed a handful of games out resulting in an imbalance of schedules.  The games that kill me are not the weekend games, but the weekday ones.  I had to practically kill to make a 5:30pm game on a Tuesday.  This year the team decided to bring rather than buy snacks.  When I checked we were a good few weeks down the list so I didn't think anything of it.  Until there was no snack.  Still thought nothing of it.  Until my husband looked at me and said "Oh God.  I hope it wasn't our turn." "I'm sure it's not - we were way down the list." I even pulled out my phone to reference the snack list.  Then I saw it.  "SH*T - it was us!"

Now granted it was a week night and most families were on their way home to dinner, so no one really cared, but it's not the snack part I was most devastated by.  It's that this was the first time ever we couldn't cover everything.  Sure, we're not perfect and we miss stuff, but it's usually dumb stuff that would only affect us and had no major impact.    This latest lapse was a clear sign to me that we were in way over our heads.

I know there are super-moms and dads out there who appear to who work full time fulfilling jobs, get fresh healthy meals on the table, have no dirty laundry, compete in iron man competitions and be ever present in their children's lives with no mis-step.  I used to strive for this, but I have concluded that these parents are completely lying to the rest of us.  There is no possible way without actually halting all sleep that this is possible to cover.  I plan the crap out of things to make sure I can cover and we still miss the mark sometimes and it's never pretty.

To say our lives have been busy would be an understatement. I am definitely an 8-5 girl who will do what it takes throughout the day to make sure that I get out the door and on the road at 5:00pm. Lately, I've had to cut lunch (ie my grocery shopping hour) and actually work a few hours later to ensure I get all the bases covered. My work life has been insane.  I have literally been running from one thing to the next.  I broke into a sweat one day last week trying to run to two separate, but equally important meetings on different floors!  I can count at least three occasions that I thought I might start crying at my desk (which I thankfully avoided).  For the first time, I actually exhaled in relief just to sit in traffic knowing  I can't get anywhere fast.

My husband who I've come to depend on to cover local things for the kids like sports, walking to school and the occasional mommy-chat to stay in the know has been swamped too.  I mentioned a few weeks ago that he was struggling to make a career choice and although he hasn't come right out and said which way he's moving I get the picture.  He is gearing up to launch a new company with a new partner and I'm excited and nervous about it all at the same time.  This decision will either solidify my work status or set me free...nail biter.

In the mix of all this crazy, my sweet little boy lost his first tooth.  It has been hurting him the last few weeks and this past Saturday he finally had his dad help him yank it.  I didn't think his little smile could get any better...and then it did.

I know we're all over extended and I keep telling myself to inhale every moment of their sweet little faces before it's gone and I'm looking into the eyes of grown-ups. My conversations with my Big Girl are already beginning to change - not in a bad way, but just a more mature way.  My son is attempting to use new words like "Ridiculous" and "Complicated."  Our last baby, our Itty-Bitty, was the best decision we ever made.  Our all time favorite new thing she says, and not prompted by us, is "When I get bigger Daddy's gonna be my coach and I'm gonna play baseball."  She can barely say it coherently, but we know and it's so sweet...

My master plan to get back home to manage our household is still in alive and well.  Technically speaking I think I've got about another year and a half to meet my original mark of paying off all of our debt. I'm still playing the lotto and haven't won as much as a $1, but again, you can't win if you don't try.  We're close to where we need to be, but as my "Stupid Things People Say" desk calendar reads, "We're a long way from being where we are." 

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